What I would say to my 13 year old self

When I was thirteen I was given a class project to write a biography based on my life as a thirty year old. I wrote the first 13 years as a biography and the rest as I wished and hoped it would be. 

My school mates wrote about getting married and having kids but I took it further than that. I wrote about being a successful actress, looking like a blonde Drew Barrymore and being married to Dean Cain. I had 2 perfect children and at 30 years old I had it all together and was look back at my very long life with fond memories. 

Me at 30 years old. 

The reality is that at 33 years old I feel like I had barely scratched the surface of living. I only have just begun to see who I really am and make decisions based on what I know to be a true reflection of me. 

I'm not an actress, I don't look like Drew Barrymore did in the nineties, and unfortunately I am not married to Clark Kent (Dean, if you are reading this, I'm still keen for that date). But gosh damn it, my life is absolutely brilliant and perfectly messy. 

My hot husband.

Inspired by my dear friend Jacque (who sometimes substitutes as my mum when mums not in town) I thought I would write to my 13 year old self and offer some sage advice.   

Dear Shannon, 

I know you worry a lot about your future and so I wanted to fill you in on some things that might help you have peace. Firstly, don't worry so much. You have had a pretty incredible life and it's only going to get better. You did it! You graduated highschool and got a great job. You are successful and happy and as busy as you ever dreamed of. Life isn't easy, but it's not supposed to be, and I won't tell you any specifics about your life because I've learnt that life is about the unknown. Trust me you don't want to know. 

1. You are going to do so much more then you can even dream of. You will travel the world to places you've not even heard of. You will study subjects you don't even know exist. You will see musicals and concerts and have amazing nights out with incredible people. You will plan for amazing nights and they will sometimes be duds. Other times, spontaneous plans will deliver lasting memories. Be spontaneous. Be adventurous. My advice is "always do the thing" don't be too scared to jump off cliffs or swim in rough seas or ride the scariest roller coasters. Risks are meant to be taken. This is what gets the heart pumping and makes you feel alive. Be the bold one.

2. Choose your friends carefully. The friends you have now are not very nice people. Remember though, they are only 13 too. Forgive them when they hurt you which they will soon. You will reconnect as adults and the bitterness is a lot harder to deal with then rather than now. The day you spend your lunch time crying in the toilets is a memorable one but guess what, this is the first and last time it will happen like this. 

Friends letting you down is the first real heartbreak you will have in your life but I promise you will be okay. Don't let what they say affect your self worth. You are not who they say you are. 

Choose friends who are good for you, care about you and build you up. Don't be drawn to friendships that are one sided. It's in your nature to give everything you have to your friends. Make sure they are not just takers but also generous in their love, time affection and speach. 

You future friends are everything you need and are so amazing. Not all friendships last a lifetime and that's okay. Friendships will change and grow as you change and grow. You will find yourself loved with the friends you have who know and understand you. Cherish your true friends and be a good friend. The next time you cry in a toilet stall you will be thirty. It will be about a stupid boy and guess what, you will have an amazing friend there to listen, comfort, pray for you and remind you who you are. 

3. Apply yourself to your school work. You need to develop some self discipline when it comes to homework because guess what, you will still have it as an adult. Don't allow yourself to get by in school by being charming and no trouble to the teachers. They teachers may pass you on subjects based on your personality but that will only get you so far. You will be kicking yourself when you get to uni and realise you can't sit still with a book for more than 5 minutes. 

4. Always turn to God. This is the year when you discover a real relationship with God. You will start to have visions and hear the plans God has for you. Be secure in this, you are a child of God and that's a great quality. People won't get it and won't understand and that's fine. Just live a real and authentic life in your Christian walk. This is the very core of who you are and is more evident in you then you even understand. This will shape so many decisions you make. You will put your values first and find that this gives you a life with hardly any regret. When I said in point one about "Do the thing". This second rule over turns the first rule "Do what you know is right, not what you think is popular" 

5. Work is worship. It was only last week that this was a revelation to me. I would love to have known this at 13. Even before the fall of Eden God gave Adam and Eve the job to tend the garden and name the animals (you try to name all the animals in the world, if that's not a full time job then I don't know what is). You see work as a punishment. As part of the fallen world we live in. And yeah there are elements of working hard for little or no reward, for back breaking work. But know this, working hard in what you are gifted in... That is pure worship. This is saying "God, I give you back in work what you have given to me in skill" this will change the way you look at work. Shame it takes another 20 years to figure this out. 

6. Be yourself. You will always feel a bit odd and different than everyone else. Fitting in doesn't work for you. You are too honest, care too much about people's feelings and a bit too awkward to be one of the cool kids. This will end up being your best qualitys, your ability to be your own person will not always win you favour with everyone but it will cause you to stand strong through tough times and set you on a good path for life. So sing those Spice Girls songs, wear your knock off surfie backpack with both straps tight, straighten your patterned plastic framed glasses and go about your life being the fabulous you. 

No, I'm not giving you any more hints about life in 2016 except that these three words will be very important in your future: 

- Instagram
- John Mayer
- Selfies

lots of love, You
xxx